Are all the violences the same?

NO!

First of all I would like to say that the violences are not all the same.

I would like also to say that violence happens in specific contexts and relationships and we need to aknowledge them because are not granted or natural.

Instead of keep speaking about sexual abuses what about broading a little bit the speech and starting making some differences and connections; in other words thinking. 

I found this #metoo an unhappy generalization. Considering that generalizing is a main stream habit I will use it as well, you will forgive me: I am not sure is the same being raped in the China countryside and a sexual abuse in the Hollywood industry.

Just in case some twisted mind would have the doubt: I condemn violence in all its forms but I think it is important to recognize the differences and try to build some hypotesis about the reality.

Lets try to focus a little bit closer on the phenomenon that medias are highlighting nowdays. 

Just to get the idea of what I mean I will formulate some questions related to the news that are brainwashing the public opinion, oops I mean informing the public opinion.  

So are you ready?! For estance: 

What's about the culture of working in the american cinema industry? I mean how that job is symbolized by the people are sharing that context?

What are the processes that lead professional relationships to turn out in a sexual abuses?

Why women are exposed to this possibility in that specific industry?

What are the tools to proctect the dignity of work of women in that context?

Is there a glass ceiling?

What are the criteria that allow people to work in that system?

Are there labor unions?

Are artists aware about their right as actors?   

Ok. I stop it.

And yes, some of this question are rethorical.

Habermas a sociologist said:

"La spirale della violenza inizia con una spirale di disturbi comunicativi che creano una spirale di reciproca diffidenza;quest'ultima se diviene incontrollabile, sfocia nell'interruzione della comunicazione"[ita]

=

[sub_eng]

"The spiral of violence begins with a spiral of communicative disorders that create a spiral of mutula distrust, the latter if it becomes uncontrollable, results in the interruption of the communication".

First of all we can think that Habermas liked the word spiral. I think comes from the latin word spira not 100% sure, 90% (the link takes you to the italian etymology).

Anyway, I do agree that  violence is a intersubjective process and that when violence happen there is an interruption of the communication. An interruption about what is going on in the relationship while people are getting involved. 

The problems with misunderstanding are not a linguistic problem (maybe also but not mainly) but are about the will that move and organize the relationships it self. That's why when you ignore or deny a misunderstanding you are allowing soon or later violence to happen in that relationship.

So I found really important teaching to whoever the use and the power of their voice as a self defence tool.

You won't belive how difficult could be screaming when you are frighten and how powerfull is to scream if you have been trained to defende yourself and other around you.

I think in every school kids should learn how to scream to defend themself and to scare the offender. Lets think about even a little dog barking. The idea to spread is that you are not a victim, you can become it. 

Once I was attending a course about violences against women and we played this game:

Do the anagram of VITTIMA that in english is victim.

Se sei italiano provaci prima di andare avanti (if you are italian try to do it before reading further.)

There are several possibities and the following, up to me, can help us to think. 

VITTIMA = Victim

V that is a roman number for 5 

and

ATTIMI that means moments

The idea is that it takes five moments to become a victim.

So there is a process.

Cold blood in the worst cases can save your life.  

An for what concern violence in the intimate relationships it is a dramatic semplication thinking in terms of executier and victims.

I also think that would be important starting to speak out about sexual violence on men, that exists and that till now is a contemporary tabù.

(Music:King Crimson)

"This song is a commentary on the Vietnamese War and a criticism of the politicians who were running it.

Schizoid personality disorder is a personality disorder that renders the subject somewhat detached, apathetic, recluse in a fantasy world rather than tied to real connections.

The song acts as a kind of prophecy, predicting that men of the 21st century will all grow schizoid because of how conflicts like the Vietnam war destroy the innocence of entire generations."( Link takes you to the reference)